Obsessed

OK, so it's been a while since I posted, I've discovered facebook is easier, although I don't discuss WLS on there b/c a lot of people don't know I had it done and feel like it isn't the place to "justify" myself. That's why I come here, where people who read have been there and understand. So, I title this post obsessed. I'm starting to think I'm obsessed with myself. I love having my picture taken and I love looking at myself in the photos. Is that crazy? I just got back from Texas and uploaded my pics onto my computer and I kept going to the ones that had me in them! LOL. I actually look good. Sometimes it's still hard to believe I look how I look. Anyways, I got on the scale this morning, and I weighted 147, which is good. I really want to start getting serious about the arm surgery. It is $6,000 and I don't have that just laying around, but I've decided that first Ihave to get to 137 which was my all time low after surgery. Once I get there, I think I'm going to ask my grandparents for a $10,000 bond that they have for me. They had mentioned a while back I could have it for the surgery if I wanted but I wasn't sure. I am just so self conscious of my arms. When we were in Texas we went to some friends to swim and we were playing volleyball in the pool. I just felt so bad about myself. I don't mind my boobs and tummy but my arms just aren't as easily hidden! Anyways, nothing new here, hard to believe school will be starting in less than a month. Don't know where the summer went.

Day 2

Breakfast-About 3/4 of a slimfast,didn't have enough powder for a full 8oz.
Lunch-1 stick of cheese, 4 slices of think turkey, mustard
Dinner-

Ran 3/4 mile at incline 3,4,5
Walk 3/4 mile at incline 5, 6.5, 8
Ellipticle 1/2 mile incline 15 rate 4
Did upper body weights

So far so good, 36 hours without snacking. Tonight we are going to Chuck E Cheese tonight for Athena's birthday, not sure what I will eat, can't take a frozen meal with me!

Slacking

Wow, it's been almost a month since I posted. I'm stressing a little over my weight. I'm at 147.2 which is fine b/c I always said between 140-150 I'd be OK, but I have this dress that is a small and boy is it small. I need to drop about 8lbs for it to fit and look nice. It's one of those fitted ones which makes it even tighter. Have to get my snacking under control. So far today I've done good:

Breakfast-slimfast
Lunch-4 think slices of turkey, 1 stick of cheese, mustard
Dinner-Lean Cuisine Chicken Terrki with veggies

Snacks/Bites/Nibbles-Nadda but man is it hard

Ran 3/4 mile at incline 3,4,5
Walked 3/4 mile at incline 5/6.5/8
Did 1/2 mile on the ellipticle at incline 15 and intensity 6
Did lower body weights & 200 sit-ups (OMG my stomach hurts)

Will see how the rest of the day pans out. We have a baseball game at 6 which means dinner will be fast food...lovely.

Back to semi-normal for now

Well, I'm done with travel for now. We took a weekend trip to Omaha to go to the zoo and a few museums. It was really nice, one of the best I've been to next to San Diego. The kids loved it. We were there for 7 hours. Talk about exhausting! I joined "Face Book". Not too sure what to make of it, seems like there is a lot of info on there. Just people randomly posting stuff. We'll see how long I last on it. So weight has been pretty much stable. I'm up about 3-4 lbs but I feel good about it. I feel like I look good and not skinny like I had been before. My clothes are all still fitting the same so that's good. I really do need to get my snacking under control though. I find myself nibbling on crackers and cookies more often than not. Anyways, posting a few pics from our trip this past weekend!

Thinking About Leaving

Well I've been slacking on my posts lately. I'm thinking about stopping. I have a friend who is trying to get me on facebook, so I'm thinking about setting up an account there. I'm bad with this, so I know I'd never be able to keep up with both. The thing is I know NOTHING about Facebook. So, I was in Vegas last weekend for work. It was fine, nothing great. I did get to see a couple of friends for dinner, plus one had a 2 week old baby, so I was in heaven holding him. You forget how tiny and sweet they are, makes me want another one. Nothing really new to report on my end, we're going to Omaha this weekend. The weather has been off and on here, nothing stable. One day it's hot and the next rainyand the next cool and windy! Ready for it to be super hot so I can sweat a little! Gotta run! :)

Shrinking Jeans

So, do you guys have problems with your jeans when you wash them? I don't wash mine that often, that sounds gross, but I only wear them for a few hours at a time, and it's not like I sweat, so I don't think they need to be washed after every wear. I washed my one pair of size 6 Old Navy jeans and I swear I think they shrunk up to a size 2! They were skin tight when I first put them on. Of course, after a while they loosened up, but OMG were they tight! LOL. So, Steven and I celebrated our 12th anniversary on Sunday. We didn't go out, we're doing that this weekend. I got him a video game and he got me a beautiful necklace and earrings (OK, so I returned both and found a necklace I fell in love with). So, maybe it cost a little more, but I deserve it! LOL. Attaching a pic of what he bought, will snap a pic of what I ended up. It'sa beautiful sunny day here today, I need to stain my picnic table...guess I'll try and start that tomorrow....I need to wash it off it got bird poop on it over the weekend!

The Little Things That Thrill Me

So for months and months I keep saying I want to clean the filter in my Dyson. You are suppose to do it every 6 months, I've had mine for almost 4 years and had no clue where the filter was. So tonight I pulled out the book to see. It was so simple, click click and it was out and I got it all cleaned. I was thrilled...how stupid am I!?!

Yesterday we went to Lowes and bought a picnic table. I've always wanted one, now I have one. Our house backs up to a wooded area that I've been cleaning up for a year now, so we put it back there between a lot of trees. Steven got it all sanded yesterday so now once the rain stops I can get it treated with some seal we bought.

We had a pretty relaxig Mother's Day. I got up around 9 (thank you Princess Athena) and did some cleaning on the main floor, dusted, vaccumed, swept, did some laundry. Steven didn't get home until like 4 so no breakfast in bed for me, which was fine. We had donuts (gag). So not a fan of donuts. I ate a plain cake donut so it wasn't as bad as some of them. Then when Steven got up he went out and pressure washed the deck and furniture the we ran to Lowes. When we got back I got the kids lunch outside while he sanded the picnic table, then we ate lunch outside on the deck. Next, got Athena down for a nap and we showered and got ready for company later in the day. We got a couple of shows in, then I got things ready for dinner. My dad, grandparents and sister came over and we did filet mignon on the grill with big baked potatoes with all the fixin's, corn and rolls. For dessert we had cheese cake with big ol' strawberries on top.....yum! Oh yea, in addition to my picnic table for Mother's Day, I got Beverly Hills 90210 season 4 (I know I'm sad) and my sister got me a bamboo wind chime (I've always wanted one, I love the sound).

After everyone left (my sister stuck around) we watched Greys. I'm so sad Izzie and George are leaving. I don't get why actors do that.... you have something good and are greedy and want more....Just look at the actors from Friends....none of them made it big in movies. Jennifer Aniston is really the only one and even then none of her movies have been OMG totally awesome.

Oh well.......Happy Monday night to everyone! Also, Jacob won his first game 17-13. He played catcher all but one inning, b/c he needed a break. He did great....althought I was a nervous wreck! He went to bat 3 times, 1 walk (he ended up stealing and scoring) 1 strike out, and 1 single (they called the game due to time right after that last hit).

Picture Happy

I go for months without posting pics then I get intoa groove and take several! Happy Mother's Day weekend to all the mommies out there!

Wow, Almost 2 Weeks With No Post

Geez, I totally lost track of time. Didn't realize it had been that long since I posted! Finally including a new picture too! Not the best photo, but at least it shows my hair somewhat! Not too much new on my end. My mom was here for a week and we had a slew of birthdays. Baseball practice has started. My son has decided to play catcher. He's doing good and the coaches were impressed. I'm a nervous wreck about him being involved in "EVERY" play of the game. We went and got him contacts last week b/c he obviously can't throw the catcher's mask off with glasses on! He's doing really good with them. He puts them in when he gets home from school, to get practice with putting them in and taking them out. Bowling ends tomorrow, thank goodness, so it'll just be baseball. Well, that's all the excitement going on with me as of now! Just waiting for the rain to stop so I can start working outside. I'm so sick of cold and rain cold and rain cold and rain!

Just A Quick Post

Just a quick post to let everyone know I'm still around. I've been busy since I got back, plus I've been sick, just now finally getting over this dumb cough/cold. My mom gets here on Saturday, so I've been cleaning, plus April is birthday month so I've been shopping planning etc etc. Yesterday was my sister's b-day, tomorrow is my dads, then tomorrow Jacob has a b-day party for a friend, then Saturday the neighbor's son is having his 1st b-day party, then Sunday is Jacob's b-day, so lots going on. Hopefully I can get a pic of my hair to post, I have no good ones from the wedding. Monday is Spa Day! Yea! Taking my mom for a massage for a mother's day gift! Can't wait! :) Also, my computer broke, so I got a new laptop yesterday....my sweet hubby ordered it for me as a surprise..talk about timing! So I'm loving my new Dell XPS M1530 it is pretty high speed!

Refreshed After My Trip

So, I had a really nice Trip to Texas ALONE! Oh, I love my husband and kids, but it is so awesome to have nobody to worry about but yourself! Let's see, play by play, we left Wednesday around noon and got in about 5:30ish. We unpacked then my mom, sister and I went out to dinner. We ran to Wal-Mart to pick some stuff up, then came home, visited then crashed out. Thursday my mom had to work 1/2 day so my sister and I went out for an hour walk. We came home got showered, dressed, then met up with my mom and drove to San Marcos to go to Garden Ridge Pottery, which sucks, and then to the outlet malls. We did a lot of shopping and had fun. One of her dearest friends came with us. We went to eat at Bennigans...YUM...Monte Cristo.....My absolutely favorite sandwich ever....let's just say I could only eat 1 wedge and maybe 3 FFs. It was so good though, hadn't had one in probably like 8-9 years. We ended up leaving the outlets around 9pm and got home around almost 11. We had a good time. Then Friday my mom had to work all day, so we went for a quick 45 min walk, got dressed/showered met mom for lunch at the BBQ Station....best chopped beef sandwiches, iced tea, and potato salad EVER!!! Then we took my mom back to work, went and saw an old lady neighbo who is now in a nursing home, then off to Victoria for more shopping. My sister was reading at the wedding, so we had to go to the rehearsal, hence our trip to Victoria. We went to Target, Bed Bath & Beyond (wedding gift shopping), Ross's (I LOVE THAT STORE), Khols, Big Lots, Some other home store (don't know name), Dollar Tree, then off to the country club at 6 for the rehearsal. My cousin got married on a golf course, OMG, just like on TV. So, after the rehearsal, we skipped going out to eat with them b/c my mom was cooking and my brother had come in. So, we went home had yummy chicken spaghetti, visited, played a game, then off to bed. Saturday was the wedding, but not until 5pm, so we got up went for a walk and ran bleachers (WOW, talk about hard), then came home and lounged and took our time getting ready for the wedding. The wedding was amazing, it went from 5-almost midnight. The food was OK, I'm not a fancy food person, but it was good. There was A LOT of drinking, i'd say about 75% of the people including my brother and step-dad were loaded! I sipped water and made the mistake of having punch, which I realized after I drank a small glass, had carbonated something in it!!!!! I freaked out, but it was an accident and hopefully didn't mess anything in my tummy up! The cake was OK, not that pretty in my opinion. Their colors were teal and navy, very pretty. So, I drove home b/c everybody drank but me. Sunday, we slept in late and I started feeling a little icky. We had breakfast then went to some friend's for their little girl's 2nd birthday. They had waffle bowls with bananas and ice cream and all the side fixin's you could think of. I had one but could only eat maybe 1/4 of it. Tasted good though, I felt bad wasteing it but what could I do. Then we came home and visited with one of my aunts, then off to the store to get stuff for burgers and out to another friend's house for a BBQ. We visited and hung out until about 9 then came home, visited, and went to bed. Actually we went through wrapping paper and stuff my mom was trying to pawn off on us! Monday we got up and my mom had to work another 1/2 day so we went for an hour walk then got dressed and met up with her for lunch at the BBQ Station again...can you tell I love that place! :) Then we drove around and looked at houses we lived in etc etc then packed up and headed to Austin to the airport! I got home around 11:20 last night, took some nightquil and crashed, so now today I'm trying to unpack and organize my house again! And catch up on work! :) Happy Tuesday!

Hair Cut Links

OK, so below are 4 links for different hair cuts. Don't pay attention to the colors, just the cuts. Please leave comments on which one you like best!

1. http://mikesilliman.files.wordpress.com/2008/03/dsc00980.jpg

2. http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.bet.com/Assets/BET/Published/image/jpeg/e34aa4ab-c295-1e29-61bc-4f1cd67af57c-life_fb_Hair_Rihanna.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.bet.com/Lifestyle/Style/lifestylestylecelebrityhair.htm%3Fi%3D2&usg=__R412GbpFiVFZs4v0FioTefKHFWU=&h=400&w=536&sz=52&hl=en&start=455&um=1&tbnid=jvWNt2mH41iInM:&tbnh=99&tbnw=132&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dshort%2Bhair%2Bstyles%26ndsp%3D18%26hl%3Den%26rlz%3D1T4GPTB_enUS289US289%26sa%3DN%26start%3D450%26um%3D1

3. http://www.hairstyles99.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/short-hairstyles-picture-054.jpg

4. http://media.photobucket.com/image/short%2Bhair%2Bstyles/aappleton218/classicmisc1/Actresses02/stone2.jpg

Amazing How Clothes Make You Look Heavy

So, I'm posting this picutre b/c I love this outfit, but OMG I look 10lbs heavier b/c of the white pants and the fluff on the bottom of the shirt. I just laughed when Steven took this. That is one advantage of being small now I don't care that I look 10lbs heavier b/c I can afford to look that. Anyways, just thought I'd share. My hair is actually tied back in a pony b/c it's to the point where I can't do anything with it. Monday is the big day when I go for my cut! I might post a couple links later so you guys can look at what I'm looking at and maybe give me opinions. I'm still not sure if I want to chop it all of. I go back and forth with it! :)

Gettin' A Tan

So, I got a coupon in the mail for tanning and since I'm headed to Texas in less than 2 weeks I thought, why not get some color on my poor ghosly legs! It's really relaxing, just laying there in that warm bed with music and a fan blowing. Although , (TIM) I tanned naked and burned my butt! LOL...so needless to say, today I kept my bottoms on to protect my rear! I'm going on the 30th to get my hair chopped off. I'm so back and forth with it. I want to cut it all off, then again I'm thinking just a trim and trying to let it grow out. Maybe I'll actually do my hair and post a short/long pic and you guys can give me direction. I really like Kate's hair from John & Kate Plus 8. I just can't decide what to do. I had a cheeseburger and a few fries from Hardees...gag, should have had a sandwich. I only ate like 1/2 the burger, just didn't taste good for some reason. Well, off to change clothes so I can go work out at my dad's later. My sister has started Weight Watchers again, so I'm really proud of her. She is very petite and needs to lose about 40lbs to be healthy. I hope she can do it. I tell her over and over that I know how hard it is and how easy it is to say I'll start tomorrow, I just don't want her to ever have to go through what I've been through with my weight. She's coming over to go work out with me then we're going to come home and have dinner, I told her to bring a WW meal with her (Steve works late tonight, so it'll be a Chefboyrdee/frozen dinner night)!

Oh How I Love The Spa

So, I had my spa day today.....I could do it every week if it weren't so expensive. I really wanted a massage, but the only thing they had available were facials. So I got some kind of enzymatic facial that was great. In addition, they put toxin removal mudd on your feet and wrap them in foil. They you also get a hand and arm massage as well as a little rub on your neck and shoulders. It was super nice, although I still prefer a massage. The nice thing about this place is they have mineral spas you can go in before your service, so I soaked in the hot mineral spa for about 15 minutes before my service, then I went and sat in the lounge and read until it was my time. After they have litereally everything you need but make-up to get ready for your day, so I took full advantage of that! I showered, got dressed, dried my hair, etc etc so I could go do some running around since Steven took the day off and was at home with the kids. I went to Marshalls to look for some shoes, not too impressed with that store, it's too expensive in my opinion...guess I'm just cheap! I then went to Sams to pick a few things up then home. We got our new TV today so we moved the 50" and stand down to the basement for Jacob and set-up the new TV and stand. It was quite the chore hooking everything up. All we need now is the Bose Surround sound and I think we'll be finished with electronics in my household! Anyways, now tomorrow I have to drag both rugrats with me to go see my insurance agent about changing my IRA, hopefully it won't take long. We're on spring break this week, so not sure what we're going to do. The weather is beautiful, so maybe we'll go to the park and for a hike or something!

What Service Do I want?

Well, I have a balance on a giftcard that Steven got me as a thank you last year for taking care of him after his accident. I was looking through the menu and can't figure out what I want to go get done. Last time I went I had the 110 minute Tuscano Bliss Massage, which was awesome. I'm thinking do I want a facial or a wrap or a massage, I just can't decide. I also don't want to fork out a whole lot of money either, so I'm trying to stay within no more than $100 on top of what I have left on my giftcard. Decisions decisions. There is one facial that sounds awesome, but I'm scared my face will end up all jacked up for like a week after and I'm planning on going 2 days before I leave for Texas. Also, I have an appointment for my hair on the Tuesday before my trip. I'm so excited to get it cut, it's driving me crazy. It's starting to curl up and is just everywhere. I feel like I have some out of control afro or something! Thank goodness for clips and pony tails!

Let's see, there really isn't anything new going on with me. I didn't realize it had been like 2 weeks since I posted. Goes to show you how much excitement I have going on!
I think we found a pre-school for Athena. She's very excited. The people were super nice and just took right to her and seemed so interested in her. I'm SOOOOOO ready for spring! We've had like 3 inches of rain over the last few days and today it's cold again and super windy. I'm doing some closet cleaning out, so I'm sure Jacob will not be happy with me today when he gets home and I make him try on shorts to see what will fit this summer. We had our hearing yesterday for Steven's worker's comp and it's finally all done. Now Thursday the guy is suppose to plea guilty, so hopefully that'll happen. Then the last thing will be for us to decide if we want to sue him. Not sure what we're going to do, it's just a gamble to me, so we'll maybe talk to a couple of attorneys and see what they say. My sister and I leave on the 1st for a trip to Texas for a wedding, then my mom gets here on the 18th so April will be a busy month. That's all the news here. I'm doing good exercising, not so much with eating. I'm still in a 4/6 so that's all that matters. I haven't weighed in in like a week or 10 days, so maybe tomorrow first thing I'll get on. I think we're going to the mall with my grandparents tomorrow to go shopping.

A night out all done up!

We had an awards dinner banquet to go to last night, so we had to get dressed up! Thought I'd share a photo, like Susy! :) They had a professional photographer there too, so I think we'll get that one back today, but for now here's the amature shot!

Enjoying My Wii Fit

I'm really enjoying the Wii Fit, more than I thought I would. I've done it every day for 7 days straight. I haven't lost any weight, but I've been doing the yoga which I think will really help me get more flexible. I also worked out today, without my music which sucked, but I did it anyways! Nothing really new here, ran to Wal-Mart, but unlike Susy's hubby, I found NO candy, thank goodness! I ended up with a few stuffed animales for next year Valentine's Day and some goodie bags. Anyways, nothing new or exciting to report here!

Wii Fit

So, I got a Wii Fit for Valentine's Day. So far it's really fun. We are all enjoying it. Athena was doing the half moon yoga pose by herself, talk about cute. She loves the balancing board with the balls and the soccer balls. Anyways, I worked out today and am going to get on the fit here in a little while. I did sprint a 1/4 mile today at 7mph....talk about wearing me out! I don't think I could ever do an entire mile at that rate.

Updated Pic

Here's my mug.......figured it had been a while since I posted a picture, so here it is. Jacob had a performace at school tonight, so I had to actually get dressed and put make-up on and do my hair! Got super sick last night, ate chicken nuggets for dinner and boy did they go down wrong. Needless to say I was hugging the sink for about 20 minutes and my face now looks like a blotchy mess. I could never be bulimic, my face gets blood vessels busted so easily that I would have never got away with it. Anyways, enjoy the pic! :) Haven't weighted in a while, last time I checked I was at 143. Also, has anyone else had trouble finding the Carnation Instant Breakfast low sugar/no sugar? I went to Target & Wal-Mart and neither have it, nor is there a spot for it on the shelf. So I bought a canister of High Protein Lower Sugar Slim Fast. It's like 200 calories and 15g of protein, I'm guessing that's just the powder, not including the Skim milk. We'll see how it tastes tomorrow for breakfast.

Did it AGAIN!

So, I didn't work out yesterday b/c my grandmother was having cancer cells removed from her neck so I went with her and my grandfather to the doctor's office. I'm glad I went. They weren't sure if they got it all so we had to sit for like an hour and a half waiting for the lab to make sure the got all the cancer cells, or to see if they'd have to go scrape more out. In the end, they got it all the first time, so that's a relief.

Anyways, I RAN a mile again today. As I got on the treadmill, I was thinking should I try it again. or just do my walk/run routine. I kept wondering if something happened to me Tuesday and gave me some kind of un-normal powers or something. Odd how you think crazy things like that, wondering if something was just a one time miracle or if it was acutally true! Anyways, I walked my 1/4 mile and started running my next quareter and figured, what the heck, let's go for it again, so I did and I made it..AGAIN! I just can't believe twice in one week I've ran a mile. I am so stoked. Already wondering if I should do it next week to then maybe the week after add another quarter or something........What am I thinking?!? Am I actually pushing myself to run......yikes....never though I'd see the day....I HATE running! I still hate running but love that I can actually do it!

Hypocrite

So, I made a comment like last week or the week before asking why all WLS patients want to be runners after they lose weight. I hate running, really I do, but today I did something I've never done in my life. I RAN 1 mile without stopping! ONE WHOLE MILE!!! I am so proud of myself and excited and shocked. I really felt like I could go farther, but I figured I better stop, as my legs are probably going to be major sore tomorrow!

1/4 mile walking 5 incline 3.5mph
1 mile running 3 incline 5mph
did lower body weights

Let's see the songs that got me through my mile non-stop:

I'm Yours by Jason Mraz 4:03
Single Ladies byt Beyonce 3:13
Cyanide by Metallica 6:39

It seemed to make running easier doing it by song.

Came home and vaccumed and dusted and swept. My grandfather's 89th birthday is Thursday so they're coming over tonight for tacos/cake/presents.

I can't believe I ran a mile! Oh, in 12 minutes. Steven was really proud, he said in the Army you had to do like 2 miles in 15 minutes. I just laughed. Maybe one day, but I won't hold my breath!

Addiction Transfer

I read alot about how food is an addiction and after the surgery you tend to transfer that addiction to other things like smoking, drinking, etc etc. I always thought it was bull but I'm starting to rethink that. I am really starting to think that I did have a food addiction and after surgery, I transferred my addiction to shopping. Now, why do I think this you ask....well, over the last several months my spending has be cut because of prices plus trying to save some money up in case something were to happen. I don't go out shopping the way I had over the last year or so. Plus the weather has me inside and not wanting to go out as much. So, I've been eating. Snacking, grazing, way more than normal. I just started realizing what I'm doing. Over the spring/summer/fall, I would go out and work in the yard almost every day, so I NEVER ate during the day, but now that I'm stuck at home more that's all I do. I have to get control of myself or I'm going to end up where I was 2 years ago. I WILL NOT go back there. I never realized how much I graze/snack when I have nothing to do. I mean yea, I clean the house and do the laundry but there's nothing else really that I can do around the house because I can't go outside. Sad excuse, but that's the only thing I can figure out. Where is SPRING?!?!?!?! I'm sick of sitting on my butt, watching Grey's and eating....that's all I seem to do everyday!

My Current Favorite Personal Top 10 Work Out Songs

I was working out today and thought, huh, I should post my current 10 favorite songs to work out to. I figured maybe if others do it I could get some new music added to my list....so post on your blog your favorite 10 work out songs! I can't imagine working out without music. I just get so pumped and could picture myself dancing at a club or something and that motivates me to push just a little harder. I'm doing good...busted my butt again today and man am I feeling it. Only bad thing is my legs (thighs) are getting thick from lifting weights, so my jeans are fitting snug on my thighs but they look great! My butt is getting a little plump too, which I never thought would happen b/c it was as flat as a board and flabby. But I've got a little bubble back there, again thanks to the weight lifting! :)

I'll warn you before you continue to read....I'm a Hip-Hop/Rap kinda girl and most of my songs are "Parental Advisory" :)

10. Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry
9. Hot N Cold by Katy Perry
8. Single Ladies by Beyonce
7. So What by Pink
6. When I Grow Up by Pussycat Dolls
5. Next Contestant by Nickelback
4. Riot by Three Days Grace
3. Pop Lock & Drop It by Huey
2. Swing by Savage
1. In The Ayer by Flo Rida

**Also, note to self, I honestly think if I ate right (meaning healthy veggies, fruits, no carbs etc etc) I would probably weight 120 which freaks me out, so I'm thinking as long as I work out and eat in moderation I WILL stay where I am and that is fine by me! :)

Update Post

Just thought I'd do a quick post. Date night Friday was fun. We went out to this totally yummy Mexican restaurant, Salty Iguana. OMG it was the best Mexican food I've found so far. I make myself laugh though because I sometimes think like a 307lb Amber. They obviously bring chips and salsa. I always order water to drink. Well, my sister said their caseo (sp) was good, so I ordered a small order (Steven doesn't eat it). I ate about 1/3 of it....then like an idiot I order the Independence special which comes with rice, beans, 1 enchilada, 1 tostada, 1 taco....HELLO....do I really think I can eat that?!? LOL...I ended up eating almost 1/2 the enchilada and 1/2 the beans. It was good but I just laughed at the food when the guy came out with the plateS! After dinner we returned some stuff to Toys R Us and of course bought other stuff, then off for a stroll through Wal Mart. I love that store, I could spend so much money there it's not even funny! Anyways, I didn't work out Sunday b/c of the snow but I worked out today and plan on working out again tomorrow, Thurs & Fri! I worked over the weekend, it was a little busy. I enjoy going to work, it's fun dressing people up and watching how good they feel in something new and fashionable! Anyways, I'm trying to get caught up on my 08 scrapbooking today, so I'm going to run for now so I can print and cut out pics and labels!

Why do so many WLS patients want to run?

Why is it so many WLS patients want to run? I use to think I wanted to run, however once I started running I thought what the HELL am I thinking? It's bad for your knees, ankles, joints, etc. Anyways.....just thought that was funny!
So, it snowed all morning today so we didn't go work out at my dads. Which in turn resulted in CRAP eating! Why is that.....being at home = eating stuff I know I shouldn't! Now the sun is out but it is like 22 outside but feels like 10.
Anyways, Steven and I are going on a date tonight, very excited about that. I think we're going out for Mexican food then he wants to go to a movie, but I'd rather just go stroll through the aisles of Wal-Mart....what is wrong with me?!? That's my idea of a fun night out with my husband...LOL!!! I'm so corny!

Food Post

Thursday:
Breakfast-Taco (hashbrowns/egg/sausage/cheese/salsa)YUMMY!
Lunch-




Wednesday:
Breakfast-Protein Bar
Lunch-Salad (let/tom/cheese/ham/turkey/bacos/6 croutons/ranch)
Snack- 1/2c mixed nuts, 1 slice of swiss cheese
Dinner-Lassagna & 1 slice of garlic toast
Snack-Sea Salt Bagel Crisps
4 dove chocolates throughout the day
I think I got in like 8 bottles of water today

Proud however Pathetic

Proud Part:

So, I woke up this morning feeling pumped and wanting to get back on track with eating the right things. My husband needs to lose at least 50lbs and he's been trying to cut back portions, so maybe that's what's getting me! I had a banana protein shake for breakfast and a nice salad for lunch. So far, I've had 2 bottles of water and did a kick ass workout at my dads! My upper body is just killing me. I'm up to benching 70lbs (3 sets of 10 reps).

Pathetic Part:

I have NO self control when it comes to food. As I put it in my mouth I know I shouldn't be eating it, but I do it anyways! I say it over and over again, but obesity is a mental disease, and addiction just like drugs or alcohol. I have a whole new appreciation to addicts and I understand how they call "fall off the wagon". I've fallen off my whole life and I know I will continue, just thank goodness for me when I do fall off, getting back on is much easier than if I used drugs or alcohol. So, the reason for the word pathetic is because I think it is so sad that I had to throw away food because of my lack of control. I tossed out leftover mac and cheese (cold mac and cheese is my fav and so hard to resist), cookies and cream ice cream, cheetos and that's it so far. I'm debating on the dove chocolates. If only I could limit myself to 3 a day or something, but when they're just sitting there in the cabinet it's so hard not to open it and grab one.

Anyways, that's my post and I'm sticking to it! Happy Tuesday!

Meals:
Breakfast-6oz Banana/Vanilla protein shake
Lunch-Salad (lettuce/tom/cheese/turkey/ham/bacos/6 croutons/ranch dressing
Snacks throughout the afternoon-2 slices of swiss cheese, 1/2 c mixed nuts, 2 dove candies
Dinner-Ham/Peas/Mashed potatoes/2 bites of a sugar cookie
Evening Snack-SLIPPED UP! Sea Salt Bagel Crisps & Some Pizza rolls
At least I didn't snack during the day....I will do better tomorrow....nights kill me!

Updated Pics

I had Steven snap a couple of pics yesterday when I was actually dressed with make-up. They're OK, nothing to write home about. I guess since there are no longer changes in my body I don't get as excited about posting pictures, but I guess I should, because I'm now 25 months out and maintaining! Go Me! Anyways, not the most flattering shirt, but hey, I can wear stuff like that and not mind if it makes me look 5lbs heavier. Jeans are Old Navy Size 6, shirt is a large b/c it was from Pac Sun, that place I think is made for "young kids" b/c even the large, as you can see is skin tight and makes me "boobalicious"! :)

Face to Face with Fat Amber

WOW! Where do I begin? We went over to my dad's yesterday to work out and he was going through old videos from like 2002-2006. It took everything in me not to break down. I always knew I was fat but to see myself on TV was just gut renching. I mean really really just hard to see. I was a big fat cow. Hugh, gigantic, fat, unhealthy, sloppy looking (even with nice clothes). That vision will be burned in my mind forever and everytime I start to slip up I will have that picture in my head. It's one thing to see still photos of yourself fat but to watch moving videos......GAG! And my boobs.....Holy Shit! Those babies were Gynormous!!!!!!

Food Posts....haven't done it in a few days

Wednesday
Breakfast-protein bar
Lunch-Chix Fettacni Alfredo 1/2 slice of garlic bread, small salad
Dinner-1/2 Grilled Cheese & a small bowl of tomato soup
Snack-7 pieces of cheese & 7 pieces of dried sausage
Snack-throughout the day I had 5 dove chocolates

Thursday-
Breakfast-1/2 english muffin, 1/2 piece of sausage, 1/2 an egg (made a sandwich)
Lunch-

Saturda & Sunday

I wanted to blog daily what I eat but I forget to do it, then I try and remember what I had and half the time that's a lost cause!

Saturday (what I can remember)
Breakfast taco, with most of the tortilla torn off (egg, sausage, hashbrowns, salsa, cheese)
Lunch protein bar
Snack slice of Papa John's all meat pizza
Dinner 2 bagel bite pizzas, 1/2 Friday's potato skin, couple of pieces of candy
Late night snacking 1/2 slice of home made bread with butter (WHAT WAS I THINKING AT 9 AT NIGHT?!?!?!)

Sunday
Breakfast-BurgerKing Ham/Cheese/Egg Crissont (took about 1 1/2 hours to eat the whole thing) and had a few hashbrowns
AM Snack-Starbucks Double Chocolaty Chip Frappachino....YUM!! My weekly treat!
Lunch-Protein Bar
PM Snack-A few peanuts
Dinner-Corn, Velveeta shells & cheese, sausage

I hate evenings because they are the worst. I don't know why but they are. I just do mindless snacking, I find myself standing in the pantry looking for something eventhough I'm not even hungry. Wish I could enject my brain with something. Well, tomorrow is another day, right?

Off to A Good Start

Ate a good breakfast (breakfast taco)
Worked Out (1.5 miles cardio & weights on legs)
Ate a good lunch (2 slices of turkey, 2 slices of salomi, 1 slice of swiss, mustard)
Had a healthy snack (protein lemonade & mixed nuts & some sesame sticks)
I honestly can't remember what I ate for dinner or if I snacked on anything.

So far so good, but afternoons and evenings are where I struggle. I have to mentally stay strong! No mindless eating and snacking on crap! :)